Tommy’s Pond to Host Bass Tournament

(OLMWireServices – 02/05/2010)

In this reporter’s latest interview with Tommy, the Tommy who owns the local Tommy’s Pond, it was learned that Tommy’s Pond will be hosting a Bass fishing tournament in March.
“When did Tommy’s Pond start havin’ bass?” asked Lanky "Roughneck" Lawson, echoing the sentiments of a variety of townsfolk who had gathered around after hearing the news.
“Hell, ain’t noone fished Tommy’s Pond in years since it got overgrowed with weeds an’ moss an’ sech!” cried LC Parker.
“I used t’ sit there an’ watch m’ bobber all day long an’ jerk m’ rod when it went under,” reminisced Lud Morgan, who had come to town recently for supplies. “Now I don’t know what to do.”
Sheriff Buck Wallace sauntered up to the gathering and explained: “I’ve had Tommy in custody for th’ past few hours and interrogated him unmercifully. Turns out he’s been keepin’ bass fer when his local pond gets choked up with weeds and moss. He’s revealed that there’s plenty of room underneath fer bass an’ now he’s got so many he’s hosting a Bass Tournament. Anyone can enter if they pay the $50 entry fee.”
In a prepared statement Mayor Porad Skinner stated that he would be entering the Bass fishing tournament, but expected no favors from Tommy.
Tournament rules and schedules will be posted around town when they’re known.